Week 37 of the 2018 Reading Challenge 'A book that inspires you'
The truth is, I wasn’t sure if this book was going to inspire me. I mean, how can you know until you're in the thick of it, right?
I've followed Kat for a while now through social media, including her woman's Facebook group ‘Self Approved Pleasure.’ I'm not sure why I gravitated towards her, but something in my soul told to pay attention to what she was saying, even if I thought it wasn’t relevant to me or my life at this time.
So I went into this book content with myself, with an open mind and with respect for who she is as a person, her journey and what she believes in.
What I got out of it by the end still has me in awe!!!
If you are a woman, regardless of where you are, or where you think you are in life, you need to read this book!!!
Self Approved: A guide to accepting, loving and expressing the person you truly are, is an inspirational memoir and self-help book in which author, Kat Trimarco, takes the reader on a revelatory journey through her childhood and teenage years rippled with emotional abuse, self-sabotage, and unworthiness. This leads her down the path of her adult life, mirroring the lack of self-love and acceptance through co-dependent relationships, drug and alcohol abuse. These experiences left her stripped of all remnants of self-esteem, deeply wounding her sensitive spirit.
This is the story of a seeker whose greatest gift in life’s dark moments is her quiet intelligence and her willingness to embody truth through rigorous self examination. For it is in deconstructing her negative patterns that she rescues herself and triumphs by owning her truth. Stepping into a career as a Life Coach, Sex Coach and motivational speaker, Kat guides readers with a quiet authority and wisdom to unlock her Be Yourself Blueprint—seven processes to help you discover your true state of “Is-ness”. In doing so, you will be able to finally remove the layers and masks that have hindered you from expressing your most authentic self and move towards outwardly living who and what you feel like on the inside.
‘Self Approved Pleasure’ is divided into two sections
Part one is a memoir where you get to follow Kat Trimarco's journey from childhood all the way through into adulthood. Early on it’s the turmoil that comes from divorced parents and toxic relationships with stepparents. It’s the power of three words useless, worthless, undeserving, yelled in her face and how that affected her for years later. Eventually, things escalate to drug and alcohol addiction, but it was the describing of her first sexual experience at 13yrs old that I found myself relating to the most.
I think for most women your first time is awkward and confusing, but did anybody else feel the overwhelming need not to be a disappointment? Did you feel like you had to pretend to like it? To go as far as faking a persona that you thought would be more acceptable by the male, only to be left feeling exposed, unloved and worthless. Before reading this book, I hadn’t thought about it. I didn’t realize that my experience affected me so much, and I wish I would have had more confidence and self-worth back then.
This memoir is raw, and real, and gives you an insight into how Kat was able to create change.
Don’t be tempted to skip over the memoir, it’s essential, and boy did it help me feel more connected to Kat and her experiences!!!
Part two is the ‘Be Yourself Blueprint.’ Seven steps to work through in your quest to find the real you, to live the life you really want to live and to self-love. It ‘s a manual that I could, no I will, be reading over and over again.
What I loved about part two the most was that each chapter has a story to it. Each step is written with a real-life example from Kat herself to help you understand the process and assist you in your analysis and application. I was worried that part two would be too complicated for me, but this method made it so easy to follow.
When I read that there would be self-reflection exercises I rolled my eyes, I mean, haven't we all come across those at some point. Their dull, generic, pointless, meaningless and I can't connect with them. Kat’s blew my mind !!! It feels like she wrote them especially for me. I haven't yet completed them all because I want to take my time and finish them with the respect that they deserve. That’s how momentous and sacred they feel for me. I deserve to complete them. I need to complete them.
In chapter 8- Mindfulness Kat Discusses her smoking addiction and how she forced herself to become present while smoking. No distractions like a phone or other thoughts allowed, just her and her cigarette. Even though I'm not a smoker, this made a lot of sense to me. I do the same thing but with food. At the end of the night after finishing a million and one mummy duties I sit down with a massive bowl of chips, biscuits, lollies, and binge watch my favorite shows. I don’t focus on the food. I'm not enjoying it. I'm distracted by what I'm watching and shovel it in.
Now I'm not obese, but for the longest time, I haven't felt like I’m at my best health and fitness wise. So last night I turned everything off and got real with my big bowl of crap. The first thing I said to myself was "this is ridiculous, I'm not even hungry." I WASN’T HUNGRY!!!! And you know what, not only did I feel good about myself in the moment, when I threw it all in the bin, but I also felt so much better when I got out of bed in the morning.
One thing this book is not is a quick fix. Thank god for that because in my experience anything that claims to be a quick fix is bullshit. I'm grateful that It’s represented as a journey, a program that’s not about perfection.
If you are looking for an author who shows vulnerability, is authentic, brave, relatable and inspiring then this divine human being is the lady for you.
I WAS born for something more – a divine assignment – a mission I was destined to fulfill but have not been living out. So thank you, Kat Trimarco, you're my new hero xxx
Is there a book that has inspired you?
Or perhaps inspired you by surprise?
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